Article by Wendy McCance
With the New Year upon us, I have been doing a lot of soul-searching. What have I accomplished this year? What has made me truly happy? Where do I see my life going in the coming year? I have come to realize that I am simply bored with my life and need to make some changes.
For many years since I divorced, I put all of my energy into the kids. Whenever the kids were at home, I put aside everything and made it all about them. If they wanted to do something with me, I was there. If they wanted to do anything with a friend, I was available to drive them wherever they needed to go.
Now I know that what I am describing is simply being a mom, but trust me when I say I took it to the extreme. I wouldn’t see my friends, go out with my husband, work overtime or do anything that didn’t focus solely on the kids when they were home. I don’t regret one moment of the way I went about taking care of the kids. This was just how I decided to take care of them.
Now the kids are getting older. They are much more independent now. I have had more time to put into my interest of writing and my career as a real estate agent. I am learning how to work on me again. I have had some incredible moments, but overall I am feeling a strange type of boredom.
I have an excellent relationship with my husband and have several hobbies that I still enjoy. What I’m trying to describe isn’t depression, but after some soul-searching, I have come to realize that I have lost my way when it comes to having a social life.
I have some nice friends and keep in touch on Facebook, but to be quite honest, I have never embraced the traditional ways that people keep up with each other. A little secret, I just don’t enjoy Facebook (for instance). Facebook seems boring to me. How many times can you like a person’s status? I do like seeing the pictures and knowing friends and family are doing well. There is just no depth to the site and as I am realizing, that is what I feel I am missing.
I have had the same group surrounding me for as long as I can remember. Sure these are lovely people, but I believe my boredom comes from a lack of a challenge and a stimulating new experience. I want to get to know some new people who can turn my world upside-down. I want to know someone who I can look to as a mentor. I want to meet another person whose life is nothing like I have ever known. I feel like I need to grow intellectually and even artistically through some new social experiences.
I don’t know if this rambling of thoughts will make sense when read by another, but if it does, and especially if you have had this experience, what did you do to get out of your comfort zone and switch up your experiences a little? I have thought about joining some groups, but I keep putting it off because of the uncomfortable nature of being placed in an environment with no one I know.
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