The Secret To Getting What You Want

Captured In Crystal

Article by Wendy McCance

I read an article the other day about how you should never want anything.  That wanting something just sets you up for failure.  Have you ever wanted something so bad that it does nothing more than mentally exhaust you?

When I first read this article, my initial thought was, how could you not want something?  Wanting is a part of human nature.  Wanting is what motivates you into doing.  I sat there contemplating this not wanting thing and then understood what the article was trying to say.

Wanting without doing will put you in a tailspin.  The moment you catch yourself wanting, what would happen if you turned that moment into a trigger or a sign to switch your mindset to doing?  The instant a want presents itself, change your thinking to what you will do to get what you want and act on it (the key component) and you will find success.  I took this advice and spent some time reviewing the things I had wanted.  I thought about what I was doing to get those things.  Sadly, not much was the answer I came up with.  I liked this new perspective so I decided to challenge myself to see what would happen if I consciously changed the way I looked at getting what I wanted.

I hadn’t realized how much time I was spending wishing to see my stories in magazines.  I also want to publish a book.  I have started and stalled these processes over and over.  I sent out some articles to magazines for instance, then just stopped.  I wrote sporadically the book I am trying to finish and then got sidetracked.

I have realized that the more I want something, the more I jeopardize myself.  I have no idea why, but the realization was enough to put me back on track.  I thought of this blog and how I would write something each day.  I enjoy being able to touch on a subject each day and stick it on this blog.  What would happen if I did the same thing with the wants I have?

I have been touching on these goals of writing for magazines and continue to write my book by allowing some time for each.  If I send out even one query letter to one magazine a day, I am allowing myself to see success because I am putting my wants in motion.  Obviously I will be sending out more than one letter a day, but it’s still a start that I am doing something with my wishes.

I have also noticed that I had been slacking in other areas.  Wanting does bring you down.  I had neglected some cleaning around the house, my hair was showing signs of age and needed to be freshened up and my nails were looking a little neglected.  The day I got sick of wanting and decided that I needed to get moving, I cleaned the house, did my hair and nails and sent our a few query letters.   The combination of things I did for myself really did help to motivate me.  I felt revitalized and had gotten that kick in the butt I needed to get moving again.

As far as the self-maintenance and cleaning go, there is something about feeling your best personally and by what surrounds you that definitely helps make you feel confident in other areas.  I highly suggest that if you need to give yourself a recharge, that you need to look at all the components of what makes you feel good and not just the want you are after the most.  Taking care of all areas that are being neglected will raise your self-esteem much higher and will help to put you in the mindset you need to achieve success.

Concentrate on doing  not wanting to get what you want.  Wanting does nothing but drain your energy.  Wanting should not be a part of your life.  When you catch yourself wanting, change it to doing and you will get what you are after.  No wanting needed.

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Wendy McCance

Wendy McCance is a Michigan based freelance writer and social media consultant. Wendy has gained attention as the founder of the popular blog Searching for the Happiness which can be viewed in 9 local papers online, including the Oakland Press. The combination of writing skills and social media knowledge is what makes Wendy such a powerhouse to work with. Stay tuned for opportunities to advertise, guest post and as always, have your questions answered.

To contact Wendy McCance about a writing or social media assignment, interview or speaking engagement, please email her at: mccance.wendy@gmail.com

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11 thoughts on “The Secret To Getting What You Want

  1. Dear Wendy,
    This is such a good post with so many great insights. Sometimes I think the problem is that we want without really looking into the “why” of the “want.” If we did, we would find out that many of those “wants” are based on erroneous conclusions (“I want to be rich so I will be happy). People often confuse “wanting” with “goal-setting”. But wanting without doing is just wishing. If you want something, turn it into a goal, then create a plan to reach that goal and start following it. Otherwise, drop the want!
    Nancy

  2. I love this. A lady on the internet known as FlyLady teaches cleaning and organization says you should never do anything productive without being dressed head to toe; that has changed my self-maintence, cleaning, completely.

    I think my wants become needs before they start affecting me, personally. When I need something, of course I’m motivated to work for it

  3. Love this “Wanting without doing will put you in a tailspin. The moment you catch yourself wanting, what would happen if you turned that moment into a trigger or a sign to switch your mindset to doing? The instant a want presents itself, change your thinking to what you will do to get what you want and act on it (the key component) and you will find success. I took this advice and spent some time reviewing the things I had wanted.” Thank you so much for this article. You seem so wise.

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