Article by Wendy McCance
Do you know someone who lies? I’m not talking about the occasional fib, but the person who can’t create a sentence without lying within it. This conversation was brought up at home this weekend and got me thinking. Is there are a certain type of person who is more prone to lying than another?
Let me backtrack for a moment. Over the weekend, we received a visit from a relative. The person came to the door to drop off some items for one of the kids. When my husband answered the door, this person asked where the kids were. They said they had tried to give the kids a heads up that they would be stopping by. My husband explained that they were all out with their friends and described the activities they were doing. The relative then said that they had wondered because they had tried to call and text each kid and had gotten no response.
Why this relative didn’t just call us is beyond me, but that’s not even the point. When the kids got home, we asked them if anyone had gotten a call or text from the relative. They all said they hadn’t heard from them. The kids take their phones everywhere they go. They know to keep their phones charged and turned on so that we can stay in contact with them. They all even checked their phones just to make sure they hadn’t missed anything.
This relative had never contacted even one of the kids. They had lied. What’s so crazy is that there was no point in lying. It didn’t matter if they had tried contacting someone or just spontaneously stopped by to drop something off. This particular person does not know how to create a sentence without throwing in a lie. They have done this for so long now that when they go back in their memory to recount something, the lie comes up in their head as something that genuinely happened. They cannot tell fact from fiction anymore.
So I was talking with one of the kids about what had happened and they mentioned a friend they knew who did the same type of thing. I know of someone else as well. We started to try to figure out if there was a certain personality type or something within their lives that made them go to lying as a way of coping.
It’s interesting that each person we thought of had a rough childhood. Of course, rough is a matter of opinion, but these were all people who seemed to get lost in the crowd. Each person would have to do something a bit more extraordinary to stand out and get some attention. Each person also came from a family that had parents who weren’t overly nurturing or loving. The homes were just too busy with activity and the parents were tired and burned out.
Who knows if our assumptions of why these individuals turned toward a life of make-believe is true. Each of these families had other siblings that did not go in that direction at all. Why some siblings go one direction and some go a different way is possibly personal experience or personality based. It is interesting though to try to figure out why for some, a life of continuous lies seems to satisfy their personal needs.
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