Article by Wendy McCance
I’ve been trying to figure out if the world has changed or if people have always had such a peculiar response when someone really cares and wants to help you succeed in your endeavour.
Over the years I have found I can break down a person’s response to a helping hand in three ways.
The Grabber- You have the person who is more than willing to take whatever help and advice they can get. At the same time, it quickly becomes apparent that this same type of person will never do anything to help themself along the way. They are depending fully on your efforts because for them to attempt to achieve a goal seems too difficult. They can’t figure out how to proceed, even with help and advice. They find it easier to lean on others to provide them with everything they need.
The Distrustful- The second type of person is distrustful of any interest by someone else. You can see their vision, feel excited for their future and see how hard they are working to get there, but if you show any interest in wanting to help, you are froze out immediately. These people have had to depend on themselves for everything, have been burned many times and are not open to getting any support by anyone at any time.
The Open-minded- The third type of person is an awful like the second type of personality with one exception, they leave the door cracked open with the possibility of letting you in if you can prove yourself as trustworthy and are truly there to be a guide in their best interest only.
The reason I find the world to be in such a sad state is because there is so much greed by The Grabbers and so much distrust from The Distrustful.
I have met all three types of people in my life. The Grabbers seems to be around every corner and will take advantage (many times unknowingly) of any person they think can get them to where they want to go. No matter how well they sell their story to you and no matter how much you help them out, they will never lift a finger on their own. Nope, all of the work must come from you. You know how to get them where they want to go and you can do it so much better than they can. Why would they possibly jump in and do any of the work when you are so much better at it?
The Distrustful, the ones who are 100% closed off and will run the other way if you show even an iota of interest break my heart. These are the most hardworking people I have ever met. They will make it on their own, but they don’t need to struggle so hard. There are so many people who respect what they are doing and would love to pitch in to support them. But, it will never happen. Their scars are too great to open the door to anyone’s efforts. They feel most comfortable trusting in their own abilities only to get them there.
The Open-minded personality is the rarest type I have personally come across. I have to admit that when I meet these people I probably go a bit overboard wanting to support them. It’s thrilling to see what they are doing for themselves. It is impressive to see how hard-working, determined and talented they are. You just can’t help to want to see them make all their dreams come true. I always feel lucky when I meet one of these people. No matter what advice you give them or what you do to help them along, they are continuously speeding past you with incredible energy and new ideas. They take all the advice they find worthy and implement it quickly. They are truly amazing people to know.
Why can’t more people be like The Open-minded personality type? Why are there so many people who can’t find an ambitious bone in their body, but are pros at using others to get them where they want to go? Why are there so many people like The Distrustful who have had the horrible misfortune of fending for themself because they have grew up having to survive that way.
What is wrong with the world? Why can’t it be easier? Why can’t people just help each other and those who are being assisted grab the reins and create what they are desiring to do?
The world can be a sad place.
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